My Labour and Delivery Story

After a short little break and a quick pit stop for my 25th Birthday I am back with blogging and have some very exciting posts coming up and some fab reviews.

 

So what have we been up too, George has being running riot! Wow that Puppy has gained some energy these past few weeks....he has become so much more confident and is becoming more and more a part of the family :)

 

Finley is doing really well, his speech is coming along swimmingly, he is starting to surprise us on a daily basis with new words and also his imaginary play! He will happily sit and 'eat' pretend food from your hand (I am assuming this is the plate in his head) and sit there going 'uhmmmm' 'yummy' 'more' - just a shame he isn't that eager when it actually is tea time. Perhaps he is a lost boy and much prefers imaginary feasts!

 

I shall be honest, he legs are still a massive weight on my mind and I cant shake it off! We are very close to his appointment - next Tues to be precise so shall keep you all updated on how it goes. I am hoping once we have a answer and then can start looking forwards on how to get him walking. I cant imagine him on his feet, wearing real shoes and not being frustrated he has worn out the knees in his new pants after 3 wears!!! My friend popped over the other day and commented how agile and quick he was on his knees, he zooms every where, carrying his books...even chasing the dog. He doesn't

seem one bit phased by it at all...shame I cant feel the same!

 

 I thought I would share with you all my most recent upload on my YouTube channel, I go all the way back to the beginning and share Finley's labour and delivery story!

 

It isn't a massively exciting long labour tale but I did end up with an assisted delivery so If this is something you are interested in OR perhaps a little apprehensive about then take a look. I really hope I can put your mind a rest and send some positive labour vibes your way :)

 

I am sure I have missed out details or specifics so if you have any questions at all please ask? I had soooo many when pregnant and even now about other people so ask away. Happy to answer anything what-so-ever.

 

My editing skills are near enough non exsistent lol so I never managed to add any photos to this video so I shall try to make a fun video or blog post of when he was super duper tiny!

 



 

So sorry for being such a softy recently and worrying but hopefully soon I will be all back to normal!

 

Thank you all so much.

 

Lots of Love

 

Kayleigh x

Fathers....and Childbirth

I wasn't planning on writing this post at all but something struck accord with the story I watched this morning and felt like it was something Matthew and I could relate too. 

This Morning featured a little segment this morning talking about the effects Labour and Childbirth has on the Father...a great topic to cover if you ask me, and one that isn't widely spoken about. A study at Oxford University suggests more should be done to support fathers through Childbirth to prevent post traumatic stress syndrome.

In all my Midwife appointments, antenatal classes and even conversations with friends I was always told the tales of childbirth from being sick, pooing yourself in front of everyone and the dreaded crowning...yikes. But I found when I was pregnant and after that there was no one there for Matthew to support him from a 'birth partner' perspective. It was just me telling him what may or may not happen, from videos I had watched or books I read, not that I really knew how I would react as we were 1st time parents.

When Matthew and I talk about my labour and delivery with Finley we recall it slightly differently, I'm not sure if that makes me more hardcore or it really did effect him so much more. The labour itself was perfect, relaxing and we chatted away for all of it...no nerves just excitement to finally meet our little boy. Then after 2 long hours pushing we knew that it would be an emergency some way or another.

The doctor walked in and advised forceps, I think this is where my memory begins be be hazy of the whole situation, even now when I think back it is almost dream like...a women's natural response I suppose. 

I had been flung back on my bed, people talking to me, doctors prepping everything around me but I couldn't see anything...it was happening to me but in a strange way I was detached from the whole thing, I had no knowledge or feeling of what was happening at any given moment. Matthew on the other hand still had access to all his senses, he could see his wife led there in what is an emergency situation, not being able to do anything to help plus on top of all the hustle and bustle he is about to become a daddy, feel his little baby for the 1st time...something I had access to for 9 months before hand. 

I remember Finley's head being born and at that moment the midwife pushing the emergency button above my head, a loud authoritative alarm rang and people rushed into the room...looking back I am thinking he may have been stuck but for merely seconds but as as soon as extra help arrived they went again and little Finley had arrived. I recall it all happening but don't remember feeling one tiny bit scared through any of it, maybe because I just knew I had to get on with it or because the adrenaline I was feeling was drowning out any feelings of fear or anxiety I had.

Ask Matthew to recall the same scenario and he describes it very differently, he has said to me in the past it was the scariest moment of his life and truly thought that he was going to loose us both. I remember hearing Finley crying for the first time and looking over to see Matthew standing there crying with relief that we were both okay. He truly saw the experience as horrific, something he never wants to repeat.

From our experience I truly believe that labour and childbirth can really effect your husband or partner, they are the helpless one and all they can do is look on and probably feel a little spare part if an emergency situation arises. I know I did the physical side of birth but if I put myself in Matthew's shoes I have no idea how I would have coped, not very well I don't think. Luckily my birth was no where near as traumatic as it could of been and I am so thank full that we both recovered really well.

I'm really glad that This Morning covered this topic today and it means I was able to share with you all our little experience. You can catch the debate they had here http://www.itv.com/thismorning/life/should-men-be-present-birth-children-debate/ 

Personally I think that counselling for new parents should be offered more frequently, and if not at hospital it should be something that the Midwifes and Health visitors ask about when you are back home. They have massive post-natal depression questionnaires for the mums but ours didn't utter a word to Matthew. Of course we look back fondly now and reminisce all the time but I think having access to a support network for PTSD would have been great, something that I definitely think needs more publicity for anyone who may or has suffered in the past.

Please do let me know if you had similar experiences or if you have any questions do let me know.

I hope that has helped some people but please don't be put off having tiny babies, yes they are a handful....a handful of pure loveliness and happiness....soooo worth it!

Love Kayleigh x

Forcep Delivery...dont be scared!

I really wanted to write this post because one of my biggest fears when I was pregnant were the dreaded forceps. 

My problem is I like to do my research a little too much and when it came to labour and delivery that was no exception, I watched every possible episode of One Born Every Minute, looked at all the labour and delivery posts online and on Youtube. I think I must be a qualified midwife the amount I learnt in that 9 months hahaha. 

I wanted to prepare myself for any and every possibility whilst in labour, but somewhere in the back of my mind I kind of always knew I would need some help. Call me psychic if you like, I also predicted Finley's arrival 3 days before he was born, I was talking to my dad and said that he would appear before the end of the week and he arrived that Sunday at 11:45pm!

Anyway, the amount of horror storys I read about forcep and assisted deliveries was unbelievable, it was like there were no positive experiences out there. Even the episode of One Born Every Minute shown a week before my labour was a horrific forcep emergency that I couldn't even watch. I wont go into detail because if your reading this you have probably already seen/read or really do not want to know.

On the 15th January 2012 and after 2 hours of pushing with no sign of Finley making an entrance the decision was made for me to have a forcep delivery. 'oh crap'.

But it was far from what I expected, I had already had an epidural so I couldn't feel any pain and I was led back so my eyes were averted.

The doctor came into my delivery suite and chatted about what he was going to do, no rushing or any pressure. I wasn't wheeled off anywhere, I just stayed in my room which really helped because the environment was familiar and the same midwife stayed by my side the whole time.

I will go into a little detail here (do not read Dad if you don't want too much information) Skip this if you just do not want the details. 
My legs were raised for the doctor but by this point you really wont be bothered, I had been examined by 4 people 2 of them men....crikey!My dignity was definitely left at the door and picked up a few days later on the way out.

They advised me they had to do a small cut to allow room for the forceps, jeez people - they said it was the equivalent to a 2nd degree tear. Then calmly they advised they were inserting the first forcep - No pain at all. All I felt was a strange squeaking and rubbing sensation, imagine getting a teaspoon and running the edge along the roof of your mouth. Not painful just weird. Then within what seemed like seconds the 2nd forcep was on and we were ready. You still have to push but the doctor does most of the hard work to get the head out. It probably took less than a minute for Finley to arrive, I couldn't believe how easy that was. 

All I wanted to say was don't be scared by the thought of having an instrumental delivery, people are hardly ever shown or told about a happy assisted birth but I'm here to start a trend. 

Finley does have a little scar near his ear but it looks more like a dint, nothing major. He had a cone head but that was more down to my waters going early and was wedged in my cervix.

I will put a few pics of his little cone head and forcep burn below. His rash went within a week or so and his head settled down after a few weeks. He now has the roundest head ever hahaha. 

I really hope this gives at least one person that 'yes, its not that bad' feeling and gives you the courage to not panic and enjoy your labour and delivery regardless :) people only ever tell you scary stories about their friends sisters cousins labour but make sure you tell them about this one and how it was so much better than expected.

I would love to hear your stories and also if you had a similar experience to me? Comment, email or tweet me at beautylifebaby.

You can see the slight forcep line on his cheek

Nothing too major - just a little mark

3 days old with his cone head - the dried blood was from an internal monitor

Finley now with his tiny scar by his left ear

Love Kayleigh x